Chapter Text
The first thing Philip could hear as soon as he regained consciousness was the sounds of footsteps. All he could feel against his body was a cold ground. No matter how many times he tried to blink, he could only see extremely faint light seeping through thick black cloth. His hands and feet were restrained by what felt to be metal chains. His mouth was the only thing that was spared. For a minute or so, he intently listened to where the footsteps were. It sounded like the person in the room was casually going back and forth. Right next to Philip. The footsteps then headed to his direction.
“You awake yet, Pippins?”
There it was again. That familiar Southern accent with a cheery yet matured tone. Philip couldn’t believe his ears. How could that voice appear again? How did the man who drugged him look so similar to his close friend? He’s supposed to be dead. It couldn’t be who Philip thought it was.
“... Butters?”
Silence commenced. Broken a few seconds after by hysterical laughter.
“Butters? That’s my old pal’s name, sweetheart. Not mine,” The man took off the blindfold from Philip’s head, revealing himself to him with a sly grin “Nice to meet ya, I’m Victor Chaos”
Philip noticed they were in a warehouse of some sort. The only source of light came from the single lightbulb a meter above their heads. The darkness surrounding them was unnerving. Even if Philip wanted to escape, he didn’t know where he would be going in this endless darkness beyond the singular light source. Horror filled Philip’s eyes as he took his time to examine the man who stood in front of him. It truly was Butters. At least, the same physical form as him. Something about him, not just his name, was off. He still had his signature turquoise palette, but this time as a button up shirt beneath a dark navy blue tuxedo set. A pair of tinted blue shades rested atop his blonde hair. The most unnerving thing was how he grinned with an unlit cigar between his lips. The Butters that Philip knew would never touch nicotine. Setting aside his appearance, the name does ring a bell in Philip’s memory. It reminded him of ‘Professor Chaos’, an alter ego Butters had created long ago as the personification of his evil side. Is that what it’s about?
“Butters. I know this is you. I thought you were dead! How are you still-”
“I was the one who shot up the school.”
Philip’s lips froze for a brief moment “... What?”
Butters, or well, Victor, sat down on the floor to converse eye to eye with Philip. He took the cig out of his mouth and aimlessly threw it behind him.
“The blonde boy’s body y’all saw in my casket? That was some random orphan kid I kidnapped, killed and dressed up to look like me. Made sure to shoot his face till it was unrecognizable and looked like me from afar. Glad it fooled everyone”
Philip looked down at his lap for a moment. He tried to process the heavy amount of information Victor casually dumped on him. He finally looked up at Victor again. His voice hesitant
“That… Is that why you spared my life in that hallway?”
An eerie smile plastered on his lips “Of course, Pippins. I would never kill you. You’re my dearest friend at school. Aside from Disarray, of course”
“Disarray? As in… Dougie?” Philip had seen that name in one of the grave’s at the cemetery after the shooting occured “Is he- Please tell me he’s also alive, he’s such a sweet boy, he wouldn’t deserve death so young”
Footsteps emerged from the shadows behind Victor, a younger boy’s voice could be heard “Oh wow, this is the first time someone’s ever verbally said they’re worried about me. I’m flattered, Philip”
Once the figure fully emerged, Philip’s question answered itself. Red curly hair, big round glasses which slightly covered his tiny freckles. Like Victor, Disarray had ditched the whole tinfoil wrapped clothes and also sported a tuxedo. An ash brown colored one that fit his shorter frame. Victor stood up as he came near. He was nearly the same height as Victor. He handed over a thick yellow file containing documents to his master.
“Here you go sir, all the Pirrip family’s debt records”
Did Philip hear him correctly? Debt? He knew his aunt and uncle were poor, but not to the point where they had debt.
Victor politely snatched the file from his hands and took a quick skim through the contents “Hmm, everything seems to be in order. Good job, D. You may leave now”
Disarray simply glanced down at Philip with a look of pity before leaving the two alone. Victor cleared his throat before throwing the file smackdab on the ground in front of the tied up blonde with indifference.
“Let me guess, your uncle hid all of this from you, did he?” Victor stomped on a specific newspaper clipping, the point of his shoe highlighting the headline.
‘Man Rages in Colorado Casino From Gambling Away His House’
Gamble? His uncle gambled?
“If it makes ya feel any better, your aunt also didn’t know about this. But guess why she didn’t know? She was too busy hookin’ up with men at Skeeter’s Bar” Victor kicked the newspaper to the side.
“What the newspapers didn’t tell, however, was the fact that your dear uncle John Pirrip agreed to sell his own wife, Penelope Pirrip, to the men who work behind doors at the biggest casino in all of Colorado”
Philip scoffed in disbelief “You’re lying”
“I wish I was, Pippins. But take a look yourself” Victor swiped a document to him. Again, using his feet to nudge it forward instead of his hands. As if he wasn’t even taking this seriously.
Philip looked down at the writings. He couldn’t believe his eyes. Carefully he read the top half of the paragraph. Prostitution, handing over assets, credit and debit card withdrawal. Victor wasn’t lying. The cherry on top was the signature on the bottom right. Even Philip could recognize that it was his uncle’s writing.
“Oh but guess what? Your aunt ran away under the radar. Which leaves it up to you to make up for her absence. Dismembering your uncle for his valuable organs weren’t enough to cover all his debts, after all”
Philip scooted back nervously. His uncle was now dead, and his aunt ran away. No-one could help him out of this but himself now.
“You killed him.” Shakily, Philip spoke up, “And you… Want me to… Sell myself?”
“Ding ding ding, righto!” Victor mocked Philip’s iconic catchphrase with a heavily faked British accent.
A lump surfaced in Philip’s throat. He swallowed it drily. Then, smiling, he tried to ignore his racing heart pulsating head.
“Butters, you know I can’t give myself out to anyone. I’m still faithful to Damien”
“Oh please, he ain’t never gonna come back. Not even I could find where his ass is at” Victor pulled up a metal folding chair and sat directly in front of Philip.
“S- Still, even if he’s gone for good, it feels immoral to do such things behind his back”
“So you’re saying that if you were single, you’d accept your fate in a heartbeat?”
Philip’s silence after that question was enough of an answer. The Brit smiled bitterly, chuckling slightly even.
“What other choice would I have then, Butters?”
Victor leaned back against his chair, tapping his foot with his arms crossed. Glints of amusem*nt appeared in his eyes.
“I expected you to at least beg for mercy. This is legit, you know? You’ll get pimped out to old desperate creepy men on a daily basis”
“Oh? Men like Father Maxi’s friends from church?” Philip replied. Indifferent as his smile dropped.
Faltering for a moment, Victor cleared his throat. It caught him off guard.
“Yeah… I guess…”
“I see. Damien told me it was my fault for looking like a girl in the first place. He said I was fated with misfortune throughout my entire life. Ah, Damien was trying to warn me! He’s such a good boyfriend…”
Philip started to chuckle, his heart felt like it was sinking deep into his chest until he could feel nothing but suffocation. Prickles of tears rolled down his cheeks. In response, Victor stayed silent for a moment. Grabbing Philip by the chin, he leaned down with that same sly smile from earlier.
“I’m sorry to break it to you, but no good gentleman should say that to a pretty lil’ thing like you”
“R- Really?”
“Mhm, I’ve been telling you since a long time ago. It’s about time you dump his ass”
“Butters-”
“Don’t call me that.” Victor warned with a piercing glare.
Philip gulped, “Victor, I can’t. I’m not a whor*. Please, you could sell my organs, or cut my tongue. Just anything but prostitution. I can’t betray Damien” Desperate and helpless, he pleaded with teary eyes.
Victor took a deep breath before sighing and letting go of him. Leaning back against the chair, he massaged his temples. He had forgotten how clingy Philip was to Damien to extreme degrees such as this. Damien’s validation meant everything to him. God knows why, not even Victor could figure it out.
“Pippins, why are you putting down your worth just because you’re Damien’s boyfriend? This is your body, not his. Ya gotta be at least more concerned with yourself, not about what Damien would think”
Victor can’t even believe that he had to point such blatantly obvious things to his old friend. Who in response, tilted his head at Victor while sniffling back a sob. Glossy blue eyes staring back at Victor hopelessly, his soft lips as pink as his button up nose and rosy cheeks, furrowed brows silently begging for mercy. He looked as fragile as a porcelain doll. Dammit. How can someone look this pitiful? Yet so beautiful while sobbing at the same time? Such an angelic face crying tears of anguish should be illegal to be this breathtaking.
“Victor, you don’t understand, he means everything to me”
“Yeah? Well he don’t deserve you at all”
Victor stood up and without a warning, he picked Philip right off from the ground as if he weighed nothing. Ignoring Philip’s blushing face, he carried him bridal style into the unlit parts of the warehouse.
“Butte- I mean- Victor, Where are we going??”
“To your new home” Victor didn’t elaborate further.
Next thing Philip knew, he was carried into a black van which was parked at the very corner of the warehouse. Even as Philip’s body was thrown in the backseat like a sack of rice, with his limbs still tied, a temporary safe space was all that Philip could view this to be. Because at least in a moving vehicle with just Butters, or ‘Victor’, as the driver, he knew that the worst thing that could happen is for the car to crash. As they drove, Philip noticed from the minimal view he could see outside the windows that it had become night time. Dim lights from each road pole lit up outlines of trees such as pines and spruce. Brief glances from Victor kept being thrown through the rear view mirror. Philip stared back each time. An hour into the ride, Victor finally cut the tension inside the car by speaking up.
“Are your hands and feet not sore from being tied up?”
The constant hints of worry Victor showed him always threw Philip off. But it was a welcoming gesture nonetheless. Philip chuckled awkwardly.
“I’m more concerned about how dry my throat feels”
Victor scoffed “Well ya won’t get dry throats once ya start chugging ji*zz on a daily basis”
Philip’s smile faded. He had false hope of sympathy from Victor for nothing. His eyes averted, “...Righto”
Silence yet again creeped into the air. Philip felt the car slowing down, eventually coming to a halt. Philip noticed from the windows that they were at a resting area, landmarked by a gas station and a massive illuminating sign on the top of the relatively small one block building that read “Joe’s Mart”. That’s strange, Philip had never seen such a store before in town. Did they drive away out of South Park?
Victor unbuckled his seatbelt, “Wait here” He commanded before exiting the car.
Philip didn’t hear a click. Which meant Victor didn’t lock the car. The blonde knew, however, that this was most likely a test. To see if he would run away. Philip may be naive, but he wasn’t a fool. Even if he ran, where would he go? Why would he even try to escape? Although hiding in the woods only to be mauled and eaten by wild animals seemed like a way better choice, he can’t bring himself to go. The only way out of this was suicide. A tempting offer, but Philip unfortunately still had a will to live. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. It would be a miracle if there are no bruises on his wrists and ankles by now. Dazed, he didn’t even realize that Victor had come back and tapped on the car window. One extra aggressive tap was enough to jolt Philip out of his thoughts. He looked to his right, finding a frowning Victor. The taller man opened the door and threw a small plastic bag filled with snacks and two water bottles to the empty spot next to the tied up blonde.
”There. Do you need to go to the bathroom too?”
Philip nodded nervously. Victor sighed as he took out a small key from his pocket.
“Any sane person would try to escape, y’know?” Victor started to unlock each chain constraining the Brit.
Philip sighed in relief and swayed his hands from side to side to relieve the numbness on his wrists “Actually, any smart person would try to kill themselves if they were in my shoes. Survival is worthless in this situation”
“Wow, I’m surprised you realize that. But I really, really can’t let you die, Pip. I fought tooth and nail to get custody of you before the other filthy bastards could, alright? The least you could do is pay me back”
Philip nodded as he let Victor’s hand linger on his wrists. Victor’s grip was surprisingly gentle, his thumb lightly traced the chain’s marking on his pale skin. This new version of Butters was full of contradictions, Philip noticed. Victor then leaned down to unlock his ankles.
“Stand up. Let’s go” Victor pulled Phillip by the arm. Once he got out, Victor slammed the door shut.
Philip strangely didn’t mind being pulled along. A shiver went down his body when a group of older men sitting on the sides of the convenience store caught the corners of his eyes. He instinctively wrapped his hands around Victor’s arm, quickly looking away from them. Victor raised an eyebrow at his behaviour. Regardless, he let him cling onto him. Upon entering, a man smoking a pipe, sitting behind the counter stared at them in amusem*nt.
“That your new bitch, Chaos?” The man gazed at Philip up and down.
Victor smirked proudly “Yeah. Cute ain’t he? Can he use your bathroom?”
“That’s a ‘he’? Gosh darn, I was almost fooled! Go right ahead, young man, it’s the door on the left, next to the boxes” He pointed to the door in the corner to his left.
Philip looked up at Victor one last time before hesitantly letting his arm go. He walked hurriedly towards the bathroom. Once the door was shut, Victor’s smile quickly faded.
“Quit lookin’ at him like that. He’s still 19 like me. And you got a wife.”
The man coughed out the ashes he smoked “I know, I know, I learned my lesson. Please don’t cut off my other foot.”
The smile on Victor’s face returned “Just make sure your men outside don’t touch my new bitch. I’m sick of plucking out people’s eyes”
“Yeah…” He bitterly grumbled.
Thin walls really didn’t help with the conversation. Philip could hear everything from behind the wooden door. Did he hear them right? Victor didwhatto other people?! The Butters he knew would never even hurt a fly. What had happened during the time he faked his death for him to become so sad*stic? He sounded similar to…
Twoyoung boys in the playground could be heard causing havoc. While a black haired boy kept throwing pebbles at another child by the swings, a blonde boy kept trying to hold him back.
“Damien stop! He said it was an accident”
“How stupid do you have to be to accidentally spill a whole milkshake on someone's favorite shirt?!”
The child was crying on the snowy grass, bruises all over his body from the impact of the pebbles. He kept chanting apologies and begging for mercy. The blonde finally managed to restrain his raging friend from behind by hugging him.
“Damien please, he said he’s sorry! Let’s just buy another one, okay?”
“Shut the f*ck up! Let me go!”
Thankfully, an adult passerby managed to stop the fight from further escalating. The raging boy left the scene before the adult could scold him, pulling along his blonde friend.
And then there was another instance.
“Oh Jesus! What happened here? D- Damien you’re covered in blood-” A 15 year old Philip yelled at his boyfriend with fright.
Said boyfriend, Damien, rolled his eyes as his blood covered hand took the cigarette out of his mouth. Back against the bus stop glass, he casually kicked an unconscious body by his feet.
“These seniors needed to f*cking get what they deserve.”
“What? What did they do? They aren’t dead are they?”
“They called you slurs and said they wanted to f*ck you, Angel. Right in front of me. Don’t worry, they’re not dead” Damien blew the smoke right towards Philip’s face.
Philip coughed slightly. A look of awe replaced his worried face.
“You… Did this for me?”
“I told you again and again, I hate it when people want to mess with what’s mine”
“Damien…” Philip tugged his boyfriend’s sleeve, which surprisingly didn’t have as much blood splattered as the rest of his black shirt “Come now, let’s go to your house. We need to clean you up”
No further questions slipped through Philip’s lips as they walked home. Hand in hand. Gratitude was the only thing that filled the Brit’s head. His heart is warming alongside it.
… Perhaps comparing Victor to Damien would be an overstretch. Damien had never committed murder… Yet… Well, Damien had close calls at that time. But Philip always turned a blind eye to most of his actions. Because more often than not, the most common trigger to light up Damien’s burning anger is if anyone dared to hurt Philip. Philip convinced himself that Damien did it in the name of love. Sighing, Philip finished up his business quickly and washed his hands before exiting the bathroom. He put on a smile. The two men’s attention shifted to the long haired blonde. Victor smiled back and reached out his hand to him.
“I’m surprised you haven’t run away yet. C’mere”
Like a trained dog, Philip took his hand and held it close. Alas, they went back in the van. Philip was given the privilege to sit in the passenger seat due to ‘good behavior’. The ride was silent yet again. Endless rows of trees pass by them. Philip didn’t even have the appetite to touch the water or food in the backseat.
“... Victor, what happened to you, really?”
Instantly, Victor answered, “Life happened, I guess. Y’know what I mean. Got sick of the boys picking on us all the time. Got sick of my sh*tty parents. Got sick of everyone else. Excluding you and Dougie, of course”
Victor’s fingers drummed quietly on the steering wheel. Eyes still fixed on the road ahead of him.
Philip stayed silent for a moment, looking at him as he asked “Is that why you made sure to kill Cartman?”
To his surprise, Victor chuckled, “Eric? Yeah, I’d say I… extinguished his flame. I mean, I definitely killed as much as I could after making sure I shot Craig Tucker in the head.”
“Craig? Why him?”
“Well, he was an ass to us both. Got sick of him beating us up all the damn time. Plus, he has somethin’ I really want. Me and him like something in common, after all.”
“Oh? You mean tiny adorable rodents like guinea pigs and hamsters?”
Victor snorted before bursting out laughing. As if Philip had just said something utterly ridiculous. Philip tilted his head.
“Something like that, yeah. I do have a liking towards cute things, do I? Is it that obvious?”
“Pardon me if I sound snobby, but you did call me cute when you drugged me in my house this afternoon” Philip pointed out with a light blush.
“That’s because you are, duh. I’ve always thought you were cute. But I knew Damien would genuinely kill me if I said it out loud”
“You… Liked me?”
Victor scoffed a chuckle, “Sorta. Took you that long to realize?”
“Oh…” Philip’s face turned red,” But what is there to like about me?”
Suddenly, Victor hit the breaks. Earning a yelp from Philip. Thankfully the seatbelt held him in place.
Victor snapped his head at Philip, “You’re tellin’ me you don’t even know how attractive you are, personality wise andespeciallyphysically?”
Confused, Philip stuttered as he spoke, “I… I know I look like a girl, but what else is there to it???”
“Philip, you’re like Cinderella. But British. And a man.”
Philip blinked twice “Excuse me?”
Victor cleared his throat before driving again “If people say they like you, it’s most likely just because you’re super pretty and insanely nice. A dream trad wife.”
“You think of me like that???”
“Who wouldn’t? I bet even Damien does. Every time you’re at his place all you do is cook for him, do his homework for him, and clean up after the mess he makes. Everytime I ask you why you’re still with such an asshole, you just say because Damien’s the only person who would date you despite your flaws. Bitch, what flaws? You’re too angelic and perfect. It drives others insane to the point where they want to strip you away of your perfection. Also, all of your ‘flaws’ could be seen as ‘cute’ to the right audience”
Ah, there he is, the Butters that Philip knew. The Butters that constantly told Philip that he was ‘perfect’ in an unsettling manner. The Butters that constantly told Philip to break up with Damien. The Butters who truly cared for Philip in his own weird ways. It didn’t matter to him that the blonde who was rambling now wasn’t the Butters he once went to school with. This ‘Victor’ was still his former best friend. He had no-one left. Could he even blame Victor for what he did to Philip’s uncle and aunt? No. The world is cruel, and it punishes those who do terrible deeds. It also rewards those who are kind. In Philip’s case however, he would still be punished regardless of what he did. Which naturally triggers Philip to cling to anyone, anything, that gives him even the slightest comfort.
Philip simply smiled at Victor, “You haven’t changed a bit, you know that?”
Victor shot a glare at the other boy, “I don’t understand what you’re getting at”
“You’re still the Butters that I know. I’m just happy you weren’t actually dead. I’ve missed you each day” Genuinity was present in each word he spoke.
Victor’s eyes could only soften as he looked back at the road, “... I did always see you constantly change the bouquets on Butters’ and Dougie’s graves whenever they withered. We both appreciate it”
He spoke in third person. Looks like Victor truly didn’t want to associate with the name ‘Butters’ at all. Philip couldn’t blame him. He understood why.
With a smile, Philip replied, “Of course, it was the least I could do."
